Tagged: change

“I Lost my Front Tooth and it Won’t Go Back In!” A Dream Interpretation.

Dear Satya:

Q: What does it mean when you dream one of your front teeth falls out, you’re really upset about it, and everyone else dismisses it as no big deal?

A: It wasn’t long ago that we explored a tooth-falling-out dream here, but this one is quite different, and it’s also a great example of how some strange images are collectively shared in our unconscious ponderings. I’ll begin by saying that this dream doesn’t, in a world full of dream dictionaries, mean anything clear-cut or distinct. I can’t, therefore, offer you a pat, one line answer. While the images may be in some ways shared among many of us, the really important stuff that the dream is reflecting, as part of your internal processing, is unique to you. You can know what it means intellectually, but it’s not until you engage it that it will provide much value to you.In seeking to understand this dream, I needed to know more about it. I asked you for some more details and you responded:

It was my front right tooth [that was falling out] and it was much smaller than my teeth actually are. It also came out clean with no blood and I kept trying to push it back in there because I really didn’t want to lose it. Finally, the tooth came out and the gap where it used to be closed up a little. Then another person in the dream said ‘don’t worry, the gap will close up and you won’t even notice it’s gone.’

These details that you offered are wonderful. Importantly, the tooth was much smaller than the rest, which immediately evokes the image of childhood teeth, which, as distinct from adult teeth, are lost naturally and can be let go of without fear. Also, very importantly, it came out easily and without blood, suggesting that there is no wound in its absence. Finally, your inclination was to keep the tooth in place (of course, you were worried about losing it!), but when the tooth finally fell-out, the space where it had been began to close-up. Someone told you “don’t worry… you won’t even notice it’s gone.”

Whew! These details are so important. I shared with you my sense that this dream is reflecting some big anxiety that you’re experiencing these days, but it is also providing you with quite of bit of reassurance, if you’re able to see it. The unconscious mind can be privy to a great deal of insight and information that we have not yet been able to consciously take-in. In our continued dialogue, you shared with me that you have moved recently, and that many relationships have shifted as well. You have, in fact, endured loss, and in response to the fear and anxiety around the changes, you may be trying to keep things just as they are. It seems it’s time to let the changes happen, trust, and let go of the fight. Change and loss rarely feel good, but these changes you’re experiencing are part of a natural course of events and, while shocking, are part of your natural growth. Remember to take some deep breaths and trust the process you’re currently in. You may not understand how, but the gaps you see now will close and soon, you will no longer notice what you’ve lost.

Do you have a question about your dreams? Send me an email! satya@quarterlifecounselor.com

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Satya is a psychotherapist in private practice in Portland, Oregon specializing in dream work, the quarter-life crisis, and work with individuals in their late teens, 20s and 30s. www.QuarterLifeCounselor.com

“Burning my Old Table and Chairs.” A Dream Interpretation.

Dear Satya:

Q: I’m getting rid of stuff and I decide to throw out this wooden table and chairs set. I think, “My mom bought this for me at a garage sale for $65” which is true (it was my set when I first moved out on my own and I had it until recently when my fiancé and I bought a house). I tear apart the chairs with the intention of using them for firewood. They come apart easily, but I notice that the bolts holding the pieces together are enormous and very sturdy, even though the chairs are not. I decide to use the chair pieces for firewood anyway, but when I come to the table itself, I change my mind. I decide to keep it, even though it’s kind of crappy. I regret having torn apart the chairs.

A: Well, my dear, it seems like you’re in the middle of some pretty significant life shifts, huh? I mean, you say you’re engaged, so it doesn’t take much dream interpretation to understand that! But your dream lays out what’s also happening on the inside: you’re sorting through the stuff of life, of earlier days, and tossing away the family and single life for the older, married one.

But that’s just the easy stuff. The bigger things in this dream appear to be a reluctance to change. You’re stuck between wanting to get rid of, literally and psychically, “your stuff.” You know it’s time, but you’re still holding back. You decide to tear apart a set of furniture but then, see it in a new way, reconsider its value, see what’s good in it, and change your mind. I wonder, is it change that’s tough? Or is it more specifically a question of not wanting to look down on, or devalue, what is old and inexpensive? What is it about that table that makes you feel you shouldn’t continue with your original plan of “getting rid of stuff” and, rather smartly, recycling it as firewood?

I see you assessing and reassessing the value of things throughout this dream. You remember the inexpensive cost of the set, then after rejecting the chairs, you then notice that they have some sturdy components! The bolts are good. It might feel like a stretch, but I think this reflects a waffling between devaluing your family, then appreciating them again, then feeling badly for having ever lost appreciation for them. In this dream, in this transition, you’re saying goodbye to your mother’s influence and care, and it hurts a little and is a little confusing. You can’t help but note that the bolts, the glue, the foundation of your life, is strong, and you know it, even if it’s not necessarily made of the same stuff you value today. And this causes confusion for you. You know you’ve outgrown this furniture in a way, but you struggle with what to do about it. You’re letting go of those old influences, those old things that used to make-up your psychic home, and that’s proper, my dear. It’s time. It’s just a matter of the attitude with which you undertake it.

It seems smart to use this set for firewood. Respectful. You’re not just tossing it away in the city landfill, that would be sort of sad. Here, you’re reflecting to yourself how you are recycling the energy of the old stuff by burning it, even if you’re a little ambivalent about the whole process. If, in the dream, you had tossed the furniture into the ocean, or buried it in the ground, I’d think you were fighting this process more than you are. In the imagery from this dream, however, it seems you’re reluctant to let things go and move forward, but your instincts are good. I would suggest you take some time to look at what’s holding you back, assess how and why you value the past and your family the way that you do, and make the peace with the changes you are preparing to make. Dream this dream forward and let that table go, along with the chairs. Don’t look back. You’ll feel better when trust your original instincts to let go of the old and move forward. There’s nothing wrong with it. You can simultaneously know that the bolts are good, appreciate the set, and still let it go.

Do you have a question about your dreams? Send me an email! satya@quarterlifecounselor.com

Easy sign-up to receive my weekly newsletter with the dream of a reader explored (that’s you!).

Satya is a therapist in private practice in Portland, Oregon specializing in applicable dream work, the quarter-life crisis, and the stage of life between young adulthood and mid-life. www.quarterlifecounselor.com